If you're not like the rest,
they let you know
They move in slow groups
testing one another out
to see who knows more than who,
and how they know more than you
One must follow the slow group
up every hill
through the grasslands
over some foot-bridge
that of course is crooked and creaking
and falling apart, leaking, broken bit by bit
like the old statue of our lady Liberty
but, you see, still one must follow the flow
and follow they must, but never lead
that won’t do – it signals mistrust
One must follow the lead of the selfless crew
Obedience is survival
And there are more of them than you
Remember, they know best
Even if they don't, still pretend
they do and blend with the rest
Lie to them, they like it -
They do to you
For their words have no meaning
They’re a thoughtless,
Soulless, slow moving crew
Like an air bubble escaping
From the deepest sea of blue;
Out of the mouth of a dying fish
One bubble can rise alone,
unique, like you
But just know,
They will follow, they always do
Their mind is among the many
and the many
make up the mind of the whole,
it's true!
make up the mind of the whole,
it's true!
They will now blend
and bend and change
to be strange
and deranged
and a little estranged
from the old slow crew
they'll change
Oh , I promise they'll change
They'll change it all
to be a little more
just like you.
Josh,
ReplyDeleteFor the most part, I really liked this. It's strange, and original, and different. The only things I didn't like were the use of "ol' " instead of "old" -- I didn't see the point of it -- and also the slangy "ya see" (also didn't see the point) and the idiomatic spelling of "Libit-e". I found these things distracting, and disruptive of what was otherwise an interesting and original poetic experience.
I liked your poem, it was definitely different. It sounded very poetic, in a way that it reminded me of this poetry course I'm taking and I felt like I needed to sit down and really analyze it to understand what the underlying meaning was but nevertheless I liked it!
ReplyDeletewhat did you think the underlying meaning was?
Delete